There’s something I feel I need to get off my chest.

I’m tired of living in the shadows and tired of being shunned by politically correct Members of society.

What I’m about to tell you may come as a shock to some but, nonetheless, it needs to be said. Needs to be told and, I believe, the time is ripe.

Please, sit down.

I’m straight.

(gasp)

That’s right.

Straight.

I think I’ve known it since I was in kindergarten or the first grade.

That’s when I used to walk Marty Epp home from school. We’d hold hands as we walked across the back playground and crossed the street to her house.

Sometimes, I’d kiss her.

Marty was my first girlfriend.

GIRL…friend.

I have felt, for some time, that I needed to make this statement in order to live a full and open life. I was tired of hiding it and, in today’s society, well…I just wanted to get it out there.

But wait, there’s more…

(more…)

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While others busy themselves making predictions for the New Year and others with formulating resolutions, I have neither the time nor the patience for either.

Instead, I will relate MY RESOLVE for the New Year.

Before I begin, you should know that I mean these wholeheartedly and I am quite serious about each and every one of them.

So…2013…Where should I begin?

First…I intend to start an online petition which, should it gain 1 million signatures, would outlaw all online petitions.

Seriously…Name ONE online petition which has EVER gained the required number of signatures and has then gone on to accomplish ANYTHING. Name ONE. Go ahead…We’re all waiting…

I…And I suspect YOU…Are bombarded by such petitions DAILY and they are ALL posted as though the future of the world depends on YOU signing the thing. Well…Guess what?

IT DOESN’T and YOUR signature might make you FEEL good but, in reality…IT’S ALMOST AS MEANINGFUL AS AN EMAIL FROM A NIGERIAN PRINCE.

I’ll get the ball rolling and if YOU’LL just sign on…WE CAN STOP ONLINE PETITIONS FOR ALL TIME!!!!

Second…I am finished with listening to ANY “End of the World” prophecy garbage.

It’s not because I feel it is a waste of time or nonsense.

It’s because I simply can’t take any more of that sort of disappointment.

EVERY damned time SOMEBODY says the world is going to end…IT DOESN’T.

(more…)

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