Archive for the ‘Snarky’ Category

Friday Fume

Friday, August 15th, 2014

fume 1

We have reached that point in the week where we meet LIBERAL, POLITICALLY CORRECT ABSURDITY with a snarky dose of CONSERVATIVE politically DIRECT absurdity.

Let’s not dally…what say we just jump right in?

It’s Friday my friends and you’ve guessed it…

I’m fuming.

Now then…in the world of LIBERAL IDIOTS…there are your garden variety liberal idiots…your elected liberal idiots and…but before we get to all of THAT…please allow me to take a moment and reflect on THE most important news of the ENTIRE week…

In memory of the ‘STILL DEAD…SO WHY IN THE HELL ARE WE CONTINUING TO GET  NEWS UPDATES’ Robin Williams…who didn’t “pass away” as is being widely reported as much as he HANGED HIMSELF WITH HIS OWN BELT…which, no doubt, will lead to liberals calling for all Americans to REGISTER THEIR BELTS…CAUSE OBAMA TO MANDATE 23 BELT CONTROL EXECUTIVE ORDERS WITH HIS PEN AND PROMPT DIANE FEINSTEIN TO CALL FOR MAKING SUSPENDERS ILLEGAL…

WE INTERRUPT THIS FUME WITH BREAKING NEWS REGARDING THE PROLONGED DEATH OF THE KINDEST, MOST GENTILE, GRACIOUS AND GENEROUS MAN WHO EVER LEFT HIMSELF DANGLING BY HIS OWN BELT…SO THAT HIS FAMILY OR CLOSEST FRIENDS AND ASSOCIATES COULD FIND HIM AND BE TRAUMATIZED FOR LIFE…

Because that’s what really sensitive people do I suppose…

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Robin Williams – Yes…He’s Still Dead…

Tuesday, August 12th, 2014

rw 2BREAKING NEWS!!!

THIS JUST IN!!!

ROBIN WILLIAMS IS STILL DEAD yet despite the fact that he is, indeed, dead and has remained so for nearly 24 hours…

Our national debt has not dropped and remains in the $18 TRILLION dollar neighborhood…

Lois Lerner’s emails have yet to be found…

There has been NO justice for Ambassador Stevens, Sean Smith, Glen Doherty or Tyrone Woods…

All manner of ILLEGAL ALIENS, some carrying infectious diseases are STILL pouring across our border and for that matter…so too are terrorists from barbaric Muslim countries.

WE NOW INTERRUPT THIS BREAKING NEWS REGARDING THE CONTINUED DEATH OF ROBIN WILLIAMS WITH MORE BREAKING NEWS REGARDING THE SUSTAINED DEATH OF ROBIN WILLIAMS…

Robin Williams remains, at this hour, dead…however…

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Friday Fume

Friday, August 8th, 2014

fume 1Day by day…minute by minute…Liberals IQ’s are PLUMMETING!!!

Every Friday, I let off a little steam and THIS Friday is no exception. I mean really…did you SEE this from a couple of days ago???

Obama, the dictator, stood at a press conference and actually had THIS to say about whipping out his anti-constitutional PEN and taking voter registration action regarding ILLEGAL ALIENS!!!

“The American people don’t want me just standing around twiddling my thumbs and waiting for Congress to get something done.”

He’s right you know…we DON’T want him standing around twiddling his thumbs…

WE’D RATHER HAVE HIM PACKING UP ALL HIS CRAP…LOADING IT INTO A TRUCK…AND MOVING THE HELL OUT OF OUR WHITE HOUSE!!!

Well…here’s your week in review…WITH A LITTLE ATTITUDE…

Friends and Patriots…

It’s Friday and…

I’m fuming.

Liberal congresswoman, Julia Brownley from the Socialist Repiblik of Kalifornia sent out a campaign flyer a week ago, trying to convince those in her 26th District that she’s all about the family and…THE MILITARY and along with photos of some kids and a family…most likely none of them her own…was one very particular image…

A woman, dressed in what, at first glance, looked like a NAVY uniform but…NOT to some VETERANS who received the flyer.

Veterans should be IMPORTANT to the politburo wannabe congresswoman as she IS on the House Committee for Veteran Affairs IS ranking member on the House’s Subcommittee on Health, which oversees the VA AND…HER DISTRICT INCLUDES…THE NAVAL BASE IN VENTURA but…

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Friday Fume

Friday, August 1st, 2014

fume 1It’s never a matter of what to write for the Fume…quite the opposite in fact.

The HARD part is narrowing it DOWN but if we can’t find a way to laugh at liberal insanity…we’ll all go screaming into the night.

It’s been a rough week folks so, let’s dive right in…

It’s FRIDAY and…

I’m fuming.

So, this is interesting…and telling.

Members of our military are reporting that they were told not to eat or drink…in front of Muslims…during the month of Ramadan.

SERIOUSLY???

Apparently, Ram-a-lam-a-ding-dong is the month of FASTING for TERRORIST BARBARIANS and according to Bridge Commander Col. Kevin Glasz, while THEY observe fasting…WE must observe…POLITICAL CORRECTNESS!!!

According to an email from Glasz to the troops…“This is a period of great personal restraint and commitment in addition to renewed focus on worship. I’d like to encourage you to learn just a little more about this religion, but more importantly, I’m asking you to be considerate and do not consume food or drink in front of our Muslim colleagues; it is a simple, yet respectful action.”

Let me try to put this in terms this BRASS ASS might understand…

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The Left’s Absolutely, Bone-Crushingly, Mindless Buffoons

Thursday, July 31st, 2014

check 1Jumping the shark is the term used in show business when any particular series, movie or television, has gone past the point of no return with something so inane and ridiculous that people, even their die-hard fans, simply give up and stop watching.

It originated when Fonzie used water skis to jump over a tank with a live shark swimming in it and basically, that was the end of any interest in Happy Days.

The Obama regime has, officially, jumped the shark.

All but the completely Kool Aid soaked liberal/socialists and progressives, those so overtly inebriated on the juice that they can no longer utter a three word sentence, are now asking themselves…What in THE HELL???

Folks, you cannot make this stuff up. They actually said these things and there is no turning back because…they actually MEANT to say these things.

First…let’s lend an ear or an eye to the shark-jumping words of one Hillary Clinton…

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Friday Fume

Friday, July 18th, 2014

fume 1What a week it’s been as liberal absurdity has reached a new high.

First, the Dictator goes down to Texas but REFUSES to visit the border where ILLEGALS are POURING in.

Then, yesterday, as the world burned…our greatest ally, Israel, began their ground war against the Gaza terrorists AND a Malaysian PASSENGER jet was BLOWN OUT OF THE SKY BY RUSSIAN REBELS…There was Obama…FUND RAISISING AGAIN…This time in NY…telling jokes and posing for photo ops…NOT SEEMING TO GIVE A DAMN that 23 Americans might be among the dead…

And in between it all…his town liar, Josh Earnest told the press that BECAUSE of Obama…”THE WORLD IS MORE…TRANQUIL!!!”

If, by “more tranquil” he means that “THE WHOLE WORLD IS GOING TO HELL IN A HAND BASKET” then yeah…I suppose the world IS more tranquil.

We could all use a few laughs about now…don’t you think?

Today is FRIDAY and…

I’m fuming.

Well isn’t this convenient?

The Dictator’s Department of Injustice is now investigating how the Dictator’s minions in the IRS “lost” all those emails and hard drives that could well have provided direct evidence of the Dictator’s direct involvement in the targeting scandal.

Now what do you suppose they’re gonna find?

I’M sure…after a complete and thorough investigation…the derpwads at DOJ will conclude there was “NOT A SMIDGEON OF CORRUPTION” at the IRS GESTAPO!!!

What else should we expect…after all…

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Weekend Edition: Allahu Akpoop – NOT Martha’s Vineyard!!!

Sunday, July 13th, 2014

tnp eagleI have an idea.

As Obama and his absurd ilk have absolutely NO intention of deporting the tsunami of ILLEGAL aliens pouring across our southern border and as we know all too well that a multitude of the future liberal voters, infested with all manner of diseases, are to be relocated to cities, towns and congressional districts from sea to shining sea…

I have an idea…as we now learn of a DEAL made between travel agents masquerading as the governments of Mexico and Guatemala (which in Spanglish apparently means ‘homeland of the scabies ridden youth’ ) by which the parade of illegal aliens will be able to move FROM Guatemala THROUGH Mexico…UNHINDERED by any need for documentation except for new ‘Regional Visitor Cards’ which will be handed out like piñata candy at a baseball bat convention thus allowing MORE illegal aliens to get to the Rio Grande water park FASTER than ever before…

I have an idea.

Relax…I’ll get to it…

AND as the ILLEGAL ALIEN who currently has his prayer rug gracing the oblong office has asked…DEMANDED some $3.7 BILLION U.S. Taxpayer dollars to supplement the need for clothing, housing, bug spray, transportation, government indoctrination center educations, $10.10 per hour per ACORN worker, Obama Phones, all the Guatemelons the Guatemalans can eat buffets and various other perks like welfare, Obamacare, and left over Fast and Furious guns for the gang members accompanying the little vermin and their human hosts without allocating a farthing for the silly idea of SHUTTING DOWN THE DAMN BORDER…

I DO have an idea but before I get to that, allow me to also point out that OUR version of Juan (Spanglish for Barack) and Eva (Spanglish for MOOOOOOchelle) are packing their bags (why both are taking mens boxer shorts is anybody’s guess) in preparation for their annual pilgrimage to identify with the middle class by staying in a $12 MILLION DOLLAR home in…

Here’s  my idea and thanks for waiting…

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Weekend Edition: Hamas Has Had it Coming

Saturday, July 12th, 2014

tnp eagleIt’s been five days now and the pounding of Gaza by Israel continues.

More than 1000 Hamas targets in Gaza have been hit by Israeli missiles as the scum of the Arab world keeps lobbing rockets at Jerusalem and Tel Aviv. Only about ten percent of those Hamas rockets have made it through Israel’s Iron Dome while the Israeli missiles just keep finding their mark. Scores of Hamas terrorists have been killed and yes, some ‘Palestinian’ civilians but guess what?

SO WHAT???

So-called ‘collateral’ damage is the price of war and the ‘Palestinians’ are whining about it…saying that Israel is committing ‘war crimes.’

Stick it up a camel’s ass.

Hamas has had it coming.

If the ‘Palestinians’ don’t want civilians killed…they should move their rockets, launchers, headquarters and base of operations the hell out of neighborhoods, away from schools and stand out in the open rather than being the damn cowards they are.

Now Lebanon is starting to fire rockets at Israel too. Hezbollah, based in THAT particular two goat country have more than ten thousand rockets aimed at Israel and now they’re testing the sands to see if THEY can somehow make a dent in Netanyahu’s defense of his nation.

Really?

Lebanon wants a piece of Netanyahu and Israel?

REALLY???

It’s also been about 5 days since the American Agent of Islam piped up and sputtered: “All parties must protect the innocent and act with reasonableness and restraint, not vengeance and retribution.”

Make no mistake, that statement is a steaming load of crap and aimed ONLY at Israel. Obama solidly backs Hamas and the Palestinian Authority and as has been clearly demonstrated over the course of his prayer rug regime’s reign, he doesn’t give a rat’s ass about Israel.

Obama made clear he can’t stand Prime Minister Netanyahu during a caught on live microphone moment several years ago.

Obama told Prime Minister Netanyahu that Israel needed to return to their pre-1967 borders…borders he knows damn well are indefensible.

Obama recently PRAISED Mahmoud Abbas stating that, “In President Abbas, Israel has a counterpart committed to a two-state solution and security cooperation with Israel,” but did he offer any such kind words for Prime Minister Netanyahu?

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Would SOMEBODY please potty train the Dictator…

Tuesday, July 1st, 2014

AC 1Someone needs to tell it like it is…may as well be me.

Yesterday, after spending the last five days being repeatedly slapped in the face with a wet Supreme Court of the United States fish, the Dictator stepped up to a Rose Garden microphone with GRUMPY the ASS CLOWN, Joe Biden, standing behind him in the lamest attempt I’ve even seen at adding some absurd sense of gravitas to his wilting poll numbers.

“If house Republicans are really concerned about me, taking too many executive actions…pass a bill.”

That’s what the occupier of our oval office said yesterday regarding immigration reform. That is exactly what he said.

Now, let’s look to that statement without the ass hat filter and using our double top secret liberal ideology decoder ring, we can discern the real meaning of his words.

“If house Republicans are really concerned about me, taking too many executive actions…just let me have my way…officially…by passing amnesty and allowing my party to register as many illegal aliens as is humanly possible.”

Oh, he tried to spin his pleading and whining as some sort of humanitarian effort and something which would solve every problem we, as a borderless nation face…amnesty would solve unemployment…cut the national debt and I THOUGHT I heard something between the blah, blah, blah and the yada, yada, yada about how allowing our country to be overrun by law breaking pillagers would cure athletes foot too but in reality, it was little more than a pity party.

What little more it was had to do with his taking more executive actions.

Where’s that particular wet fish again…the one the SCOTUS whacked him with a few days ago? Apparently, somebody needs to take another swing and this time, with meaningful intentions.

Apparently, Boehner’s pending lawsuit holds all the impact of a trout.

The real question here is…

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The Scandals are Real – Obama’s the Phony

Monday, June 23rd, 2014

scan 1Remember the good ol’ days of the Obama regime?

Me either but there WERE days when things were not as they are today. Mainly because they were the earliest days of the regime and the Dictator hadn’t the time yet to extend his special brand of Muslim and socialist corruption far and wide.

Before he was even elected back in 2008, there were those of us who were wondering exactly who this guy was?

Barack Hussein Obama…there were plenty of indications back THEN that he wasn’t who he said he was…an American citizen. Old book jackets said he was born in Kenya. The Kenyan GOVERNMENT said he was born in Kenya.

There were no college records we were allowed to see…no thesis we were allowed to read…nobody knew who financed his upper class education, and where-oh-where was his BIRTH CERTIFICATE???

Well…he cleared it all up by RELEASING his birth certificate didn’t he? You know…the one that was proven to be a fake by people who understood exactly how to fake that sort of thing and then by a law enforcement investigation that also proved his social security number is fraudulent and so is his selective service registration but…those were the good ol’ days of the regime.

What followed has been nothing short of a cascade of corruption flowing down from what was purported to be the “most transparent administration in history.”

Fast and Furious…

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