I’m Waiting…By My Phone…

There’s something I feel I need to get off my chest.

I’m tired of living in the shadows and tired of being shunned by politically correct Members of society.

What I’m about to tell you may come as a shock to some but, nonetheless, it needs to be said. Needs to be told and, I believe, the time is ripe.

Please, sit down.

I’m straight.

(gasp)

That’s right.

Straight.

I think I’ve known it since I was in kindergarten or the first grade.

That’s when I used to walk Marty Epp home from school. We’d hold hands as we walked across the back playground and crossed the street to her house.

Sometimes, I’d kiss her.

Marty was my first girlfriend.

GIRL…friend.

I have felt, for some time, that I needed to make this statement in order to live a full and open life. I was tired of hiding it and, in today’s society, well…I just wanted to get it out there.

But wait, there’s more…

I am also…

An American.

Yep.

Born in this country of parents also born in this country.

Now…My grandfather on my dad side…HE was born in Austria but HE came HERE looking for a better life.

So…I’m straight AND I’m an American.

I told you, that  you should sit down.

I’m also a Christian.

Yep…You heard me…CHRISTIAN.

You see, in this day and age, you’re considered, by the regime, to be nothing unless you’re gay or in this country ILLEGALLY.

Understand…If you happen to come out as gay…As did the Washington Wizards center, Jason Collins…You get a special call from his highness to congratulate you.

A PHONE CALL…FROM THE DICTATOR. OF CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!

The opening line of his SI article read: “I’m a 34-year-old NBA center. I’m black. And I’m gay.”

One wonders if he got the call on his Obamaphone.

If you come out as straight, as I just did…Well…Let’s just say…MY phone isn’t ringing and his highness won’t even be bothered to defend my marriage.

In the shadows. That’s where my straight lifestyle has me. In the shadows.

If you’re in this country ILLEGALLY…

You get AMNESTY, in state tuition rates no matter what state in which you live and you’re whole family is invited to join you off the grid. Hell, we don’t even know where 11 million of you are hiding but, that’s okay…YOU are considered…UNDOCUMENTED AMERICANS…YOUR way…YOUR education…YOUR medical needs…And on the off chance YOU get caught raping or pillaging  AMERICANS…YOUR incarceration is ALSO on the AMERICAN taxpayer’s dime.

Now then…As an AMERICAN…Like Chris Kyle…A Navy SEAL, well decorated and an American HERO…Well…Let’s just say HIS family’s phone isn’t ringing either.

The phones of the families of Chris Stevens, Glen Doherty, Sean Smith and Tyrone Woods…They’re not ringing either.

Also not ringing is the phone of Brian Terry’s family.

Tim Tebow has NEVER hidden the fact that HE’S a CHRISTIAN but…the media shunned him for it. Barack HUSSEIN Obama never called him and of all the countless photo ops the Dictator has had…Not ONE of him Tebowing.

Now…If you’re something OTHER than a Christian or, let’s face it, Jewish…

Let’s say a MUSLIM well…This regime is your oyster.

If you’re a MUSLIM living in a MUSLIM country there’s a pretty good chance that YOUR country is getting financial support and military hardware from OUR Dictator.

If you happen to be a MUSLIM TERRORIST, living in OUR country…well…you’re not a terrorist at all…Are you? No…YOU may have acted UP or OUT but THAT’S just workplace violence and, before you say anything…Our Dictator will have your rights read to you.

Put your knees and forehead on an area rug and the media LOVES your up in the air ass but, drop to ONE knee, rest your elbow upon it and bow your head?

Tebowing is NOT to be praised.

Rights.

I used to have rights. I had the right to speak freely but, this regime has designated as off limits any speech derogatory to the Dictator within earshot of his palace guards.

How many lost their right not to have their homes searched without a warrant or probable cause in Watertown?

And isn’t this regime still trying to do away with our 2nd Amendment rights?

If you happen to be a Christian AND the owner of a firearm you’re a bitter clinger and you can add intolerant if you happen to believe that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Coming out is all the rage.

Sandra Fluke, the 30 year old law student, came out as a slut who needed taxpayers to pony up $3000.00 for her birth control and she was rewarded with a speaking slot at the Socialist National Convention.

Maybe Jason Collins should have waited for 2016 to make HIS announcement but then again, I’m reasonably sure that the basketball court at the Obama Mosque and Dictator’s Library will be named in his honor.

Oh…If only I were a gay, black, Muslim, woman in this country illegally and in need of 3 grand in birth control…THEN…I’d have it MADE.

I would be the victim of society.

I would be ENTITLED.

But, sadly, no.

I’m a straight, happily married American white man who has decided…

I no longer want to live in the shadows of the “new” societal norm.

Yes…You read that correctly.

I’m WHITE along with all the rest of it.

My wife and I be waiting by my phone…Bitterly clinging…

12 thoughts on “I’m Waiting…By My Phone…

  1. This is great. Love this. Too bad that more people don’t come out of the shadows. I’m shocked. I can’t believe that he came out of the closet. Well just so that you know. Congratulations. You did it. I’m so proud that you Finally came out and admitted it. Wow. I thought I was alone. The only difference is that I’m a woman.

  2. Man, do I ever want to buy you a beer, and you’re wife, too.
    I’m straight also. Soon we may have to start support groups for this condition.
    Do I need to point out that last sentence was sarcasm? lol
    Great post. Thank you for all the work you do, and keep fighting the good fight!

  3. Thanks Craig, It had to be said. I am proud to be staright, married Christian, worked 58 years, and served my country 7 years from 1950 to 1958. I don’t care about a phone call, Just want my country to be normal again.

  4. Norm,thanks for your service,my oldest brother was in Korea.
    Viet vet, good writing,waiting on call but know it will never come

  5. What was your number? You wanna start a support group?

    Look me up 😉

  6. I am a Korean Veteran. 81 years old. So if I have not received a call in 60 years, may as well stop looking for one! That was an AWESOME writing!

  7. This is what happens when those who vote, learn they can vote themelves “freestuff” off the backs of others. We end up with a lopsided government, which 75% of think only about their carrers and NOT about the good of the country. I to am a white, christian, well armed, straight married moral american…but my pone aint ringing either.

  8. One of the truest,saddest, funniest indictments of this administration & society of the 21st century I’ve heard so far!

  9. Great article! Everything is upside down and I am finding it more and more difficult to not hate.

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