Archive for December, 2011

Tis the Season to Celebrate and Laugh!!

Saturday, December 24th, 2011

 

A Christmas Classroom

The Teacher asked young Patrick Murphy: “What do you do at Christmas time?

Patrick addressed the class: “Well Ms. Jones, me and my twelve brothers and sisters go to midnight mass and we sing hymns; then we come home very late and we put mince pies by the back door and hang up our stockings. Then all excited, we go to bed and wait for Father Christmas to come with all our toys.

“Very nice Patrick,” she said. “Now Angelo Ianucci , what do you do at Christmas?”

Well, Ms. Jones, me and my sister also go to church with Mom and Dad and we sing Ave Maria , dance the Tarantella and when we get home we put almond cookies and Amaretto by the chimney and we hang up our stockings. We hardly sleep, waiting for Santa Claus to bring our presents.

Realizing there was a Jewish boy in the class and not wanting to leave him out of the discussion, she asked, “Now, Isaac Cohen, what do you do at Christmas?”

Isaac said, “Well, it’s the same thing every year…Dad comes home from the office. We all pile into the Rolls Royce; then we drive to Dad’s toy factory. When we get inside, we look at all the empty shelves…And begin to sing: “What A Friend We Have in Jesus”……….Then we all go to the Bahamas …”

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A Special Christmas Eve Wish

Saturday, December 24th, 2011

 

 

Today…We wish you a day of ordinary miracles- 

A fresh pot of coffee you didn’t have to make yourself.

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Friday Fume

Friday, December 23rd, 2011

Clear the Halls because I’m Fuming,

Fa la la la la. La la la la.

Liberal Fools are Out There Looming

Fa la la la la, la la la la.

WELCOME to the Friday before Christmas. There’s nog in the fridge, lights on the tree, packages to wrap, Jesus to celebrate and…

Before we get to all that…

I’m fuming.

If you think sending your kids to a pricey private school will keep them from the indoctrination clutches of LIBERAL IDIOTS…

Think again.

In a small town, just north of our nation’s birth place, is where you’ll find, George School. It’s a Quaker high school where tuition rates RANGE FROM $31,000.00 TO $45,000.00 PER YEAR!!!

The George School put on their annual Christmas play last week and oh boy…guess what???

Yep…

OCCUPY THE NORTH POLE!!!

But little did Santa know that far and beyond, a steady drumbeat—yes, a movement—was swelling, and the masses were organizing, and the dispossessed were finding their strength and their voices and their power to declare, “We are one, and we’re not gonna take this anymore!” Occupy North Pole was born.”

GOOD GRIEF!!!

It goes on…

“The shop was sitting on a potential oil field…using eminent domain laws, Santa’s workshop was closed. The elves’ work was outsourced, and the elves lost their jobs. A multinational conglomerate took over the shop and the making and distribution of the toys and instituted strict rules for visits. An independent consulting firm was hired to do background checks on children in order to determine who was naughty or nice.”

Oh there was singing and dancing and LIBERAL LUNKHEADEDNESS ON DISPLAY THROUGHOUT THE PERFORMANCE!!!

The Dance and Religion instructor at George School, Barbara Kibler, came up with this whole stupid thing and that begs a question…WHAT RELIGION IS SHE TEACHING? THE RELIGION OF LIBERAL IDEOLOGY?????

The whole “OCCUPY A PORT-A-POTTY BEFORE YOU HAVE A MOVEMENT” MOVEMENT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ABOUT THE 99% AGAINST THE 1%…RIGHT???

Guess what Kibler, you liberal drip…Your students PARENTS are paying between 31k and 45k every year to have YOU indoctrinate THEIR kids…

THEY ARE THE 1 % YOU MORON!!!!!

Kinda makes ya wonder what she’s planning for NEXT year doesn’t it?

AN ELF UNION DEMANDING COLLECTIVE BARGAINING RIGHTS? PETA DEMANDING THE REINDEER BE REPLACED BY 8 CHEVY VOLTS?? SANTA GETTING HIS SACK OF GOODIES GRABBED BY TSA BEFORE HE GETS IN HIS SLEIGH?????

One thing is abundantly clear…

THERE ARE NO WISE MEN AT GEORGE SCHOOL!!!!!

This simply DEFIES explanation. In Bellevue Washington…WHO exactly delivers CHRISTMAS packages?

Santa?

The Mailman?

YES ON BOTH COUNTS!!!!

Look, we all know, at the busiest time of the year, even SANTA could use a little help and the rest of the year…the UNITED STATES POSTAL SERVICE NEEDS ALL THE HELP THEY CAN GET!!!

Bob McClean is a postal carrier and one of Santa’s best friends. For the last 10 years, Bob, during the CHRISTMAS season, has borrowed one of Santa’s extra suits and has worn it to deliver the mail.

And why NOT? It spreads smiles and a little cheer to those whose boxes he stuffs with mail and to those who open the door to receive packages.

Oh but guess who ELSE apparently works at the Bellevue post office???

SCROOGE!!!

Some BONE HEAD who HATES anything CHRISTMAS…ONE OF BOB McCLEAN’S COWORKERS….COMPLAINED!!!

So…the post office in Bellevue, like a good little BIG GOVERNMENT OPERATION…told Santa Bob to…GET RID OF THE SANTA SUIT!!!

Ernie Swanson, a postal service mouthpiece said, “My understanding is that one of the other carriers in the Bellevue Post Office said something about the fact that wearing a Santa suit didn’t meet the dress code of letter carriers.”

So…why exactly IS there a dress code Ernie???

“You’re supposed to wear the uniform, so you’re recognizable, so people have faith and trust and confidence in their carrier.”

WISE UP ERNIE!!!

IS SANTA NOT RECOGNIZABLE??? DO PEOPLE NOT HAVE FAITH IN SANTA??? CAN PEOPLE NOT TRUST SANTA???

I’m about to let the failing U.S Postal Service in on a little secret…shhhhhhh…..pssssttt….guess what???

MOST PEOPLE TRUST SANTA TO DELIVER THEIR MAIL FAR, FAR MORE THAN THEY TRUST THE USPS TO DO IT!!!!!!!

All was NOT lost however…

Customers, both residential and business, who have for a decade, looked forward to seeing Santa deliver their mail, descended on the Bellevue post office like a gaggle of angry elves and DEMANDED THAT McCLEAN BE ALLOWED TO CONTINUE TO WEAR THE JOLLY SUIT ON HIS ROUNDS!!!!

But…like any government entity…the Bellevue post office tried to get in the last word by making it CLEAR…

SANTA BOB CAN ONLY WEAR THE SUIT THROUGH THE END OF THE HOLIDAY SEASON!!!

Ummmm….THANK YOU CAPTAIN OBVIOUS!!!!!!

THAT’S LIKE TELLING A PLOT HE’S ALLOWED TO KEEP HIS PLANE IN THE AIR UNTIL HE LANDS!!!!!

I’m Fuming!!

Finally, we head to North Korea where, just a week before he keeled over and died, Kim Jong Ill Tempered released a statement threatening those on South Korea saying…NORTH KOREA COULD NOT BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT MIGHT HAPPEN SHOULD CHRISTMAS DISPLAYS BE VISIBLE ALONG THE DEMILITARIZED ZONE!!!

This is the most likely reason why CLARK GRISWOLD NEVER TOOK HIS CHRISTMAS VACATION NEAR THE 38th PARALLEL!!!!!!

Then, of course, the little tyrant dictator who was responsible for the deaths of millions of his own people DIED last week, joining the likes of Saddam Hussein, Gadaffi and bin Laden IN A PLACE WHERE yule logs…and everything else is on fire 24/7-365…AND GUESS WHO COULDN’T LEAVE WELL ENOUGH ALONE???

JIMMY PEANUT BRAIN CARTER!!!

Our former WORST PRESIDENT EVER…decided the best thing to do…

WAS TO SEND A LETTER OF CONDOLENCE TO THE SPAWN OF IL!!!!!!!!

Really???

SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS??? HE’LL BE MISSED??? CAN WE BRING A CASSEROLE???

WHAT IN THE HELL????

Now, of course, before you start thinking THIS IS AN ISOLATED MOMENT OF DUMB BUTTEDNESS…

OUR STATE DEPARTMENT SENT A LETTER OF CONDOLENCE TO THE FAMILY OF AL AWLAKI AFTER WE DRONED THAT TERRORIST INTO A DOLLOP OF GOO ON THE HIGHWAY TO HELL!!!!!

Seriously…Nobody is shedding a tear over the death of this brutal dictator.

EVEN THE MASSES OF PEOPLE IN NORTH KOREA WHO WERE ORDERED TO CARRY ON AND PITCH A FIT AFTER THE DEMISE WAS ANNOUNCED WEREN’T ABLE TO GET A SINGLE DROP OF SALINE TO EMANATE FROM THEIR DUCTS!!!!

But old Jimmy Carter SENDS HIS CONDOLENCES TO THE IL MANNERED FAMILY????

Here’s what SHOULD have been done.

WE SHOULD HAVE SENT ABOUT A HUNDRED OF THOSE COMPUTER CONTROLLED DANCING CHRISTMAS LIGHT DISPLAYS OVER TO SOUTH KOREA TO BE ERECTED WITHIN 1 FOOT OF THE DMZ PLAYING JOY TO THE WORLD WHICH COULD BE SEEN FROM SPACE!!!!!!

I can’t be the only one who fully believes CARTER IS ONLY A FEW MONTHS AWAY FROM SENDING NETANYAHU A CANNED HAM FOR PASSOVER!!!!

The people of North Korea are not allowed internet access AND JIMMY CARTER IS SOMEHOW MORE OUT OF TOUCH THEN THEY ARE!!!

Of one thing we can be certain…WITH HUSSEIN, BIN LADEN, AL AWLAKI, GADAFFI AND IL ALL BURNING FOR ETERNITY, CARTER’S FACEBOOK FRIENDS LIST IS GETTING SMALLER AND SMALLER!!!

Yes friends…It IS Friday and…

I AM FUMING!!!!!!

Twas a Progressive Night Before Christmas

Thursday, December 22nd, 2011

As many of our readers get ready for a long Christmas Weekend, we at The National Patriot, wanted to send you off with a few laughs!

Over the last few weeks, we have teamed up with Joseph Kurt to produce our weekly “Call to Arms” pod casts. Yesterday, Joseph emailed me with, not a “Call to Arms” but…a little Christmas cheer!! Joe said…”Craig, have some fun with this and do your magic.”

Written and Performed by Joseph Kurt…

Images and Animations added by The National Patriot…

We know you’re going to enjoy…

“Twas a PROGRESSIVE Night Before Christmas!!”

Please Patriots, don’t forget about our “Operation Christmas Greetings for the Troops! You can get ALL the details by CLICKING HERE!

Operation Christmas Greetings

Wednesday, December 21st, 2011

The National Patriot has a request. A special request.

While many of our best, the troops who have been stationed in places far away are coming home, we know all too well, many, many of those men and women who wear our uniform will not be home for Christmas.

We cannot tell them how much we appreciate what they do to protect our nation and our freedoms as well as the freedoms of others around the world.

There simply are no words adequate for that.

Here is our request.

If YOU know someone stationed far from home this Christmas, PLEASE forward the link to this article to them. We want to hear from THEM!!!

We want to know where THEY are…What THEY’RE doing and how THEY will celebrate Christmas.

We want those fine men and women to send THEIR greeting to whomever they wish via the comment box below this article!

Please, if YOU know someone, far from home this Christmas, send them this link.

For our uniformed BEST, if YOU have a photo you would like us to publish, PLEASE email it to ctmg1027@aol.com and put “Christmas” in the subject line. Be sure to identify who you are and who is in the photo.

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Is Joe Biden “Good Enough??”

Tuesday, December 20th, 2011

“Look, the Taliban per se is not our enemy. That’s critical. There is not a single statement that the president has ever made in any of our policy assertions that the Taliban is our enemy, because it threatens U.S. interests. If, in fact, the Taliban is able to collapse the existing government, which is cooperating with us in keeping the bad guys from being able to do damage to us, then that becomes a problem for us.”

Ahhh…the words of Joe Biden.

Perhaps Biden should ask those who wear the uniform. Maybe he should ask those who actually fight for freedom and the rights we enjoy in this nation.

The Taliban is not…”Per Se” our enemy?

Was it NOT the Taliban who gave shelter to those who schemed the attacks of 9-11?

IS it not the Taliban who today are the ones responsible for most of the attacks on our service men and women in Afghanistan?

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Holder Cries Wolf…No Wolf in Sight

Monday, December 19th, 2011

Okay. I’m sick of it. Completely. I’ve been sick of it for some time but now, I am OFFICIALLY sick of it. Any rational person should be sick, OFFICIALLY sick of it too.

I’m talking about the playing, by liberals, of the RACE CARD.

SICK of it.

I’ll tell you something else too. BLACK people, regardless of party affiliation should be sick of it too.

Over the weekend, Eric Holder told the NY Times, “This is a way to get at the president because of the way I can be identified with him, both due to the nature of our relationship and, you know, the fact that we’re both African-American.

He was of course, talking about the investigation into Fast and Furious.

He did exactly what liberals do. He played the race card. And like the vast majority of the time liberals play the race card, Holder played it where it clearly does NOT belong.

That is why I, most rational people AND black people, regardless of party affiliation, SHOULD be sick of it.

OFFICIALLY sick of it.

Does racism in America still exist?

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Il No More…Kim Jong Dead

Monday, December 19th, 2011

The death, apparently on Saturday, of Kim Jong Il on North Korea creates an even more tenuous situation then what existed when the dictator was alive.

Video is now coming to light of people, in a state of near uncontrollable angst, reacting to Il’s death.

This, I believe, is important as it either shows the state of mind of those who have lived under the oppression of the man and his regime for so long OR it shows that people are willing to ACT like they are all broken up over Il’s death.

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The National Patriot Call to Arms 12-17-11

Saturday, December 17th, 2011

In this podcast, Joseph Kurt and the National Patriot take on Christmas, the First Amendment and…of all things…The Occupy Movement.

Patriots…THIS is YOUR Call to Arms!!!

Please feel free to leave your comments below!!!

They Want Us to Fight Each Other

Friday, December 16th, 2011

Ok folks.  Shadow here.  I know it has been a while, but I have been busy taking a class (US History, and it is surprisingly free of liberal bias) and getting ready for Christmas with my family.  Yes you libs reading this, I said CHRISTMAS.  If that offends, so what.  Go read Politico.  If you are here to learn something, then read on.

Obama is losing his base.  In 2008, 66% of young voters gave the nod to Obama.  That is a pretty wide margin, and probably lead to Obama being elected, though his competition was pretty weak and people were sick of Bush…but the youth vote sure did help.  However, a news article from US News states those very same voters say he is likely to LOSE.  That is a serious blow to Obama, who has done nothing but lie his way through office when he wasn’t on vacation.

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